First, I should start out by saying that I don’t characterize anything I do as “courageous.” It wasn’t until about a year that I really felt comfortable joining the 21st Century and utilizing all the social media tools available to document with my transition. While not everyone in my office knows my little “secret,” some do and they have been nothing short of supportive.

The main reason I started doing this was to show that it could be done–openly talk about your transition, while holding down a 9-to-5 and being a contributing member of society. For years, a majority of the trans related websites I saw focused heavily on the adult entertainment business. While I don’t judge girls who choose that line of work, I recognized the absence of websites for the young, transgendered professional.

Even more disheartening was that it seemed the “older generation” was more adept at using social networking tools than my own generation. I understood the fear and I had stayed away from social networking since using  AOL in college, but I vowed to try in some way to use social networking tools to promote a different image of Generation X & Y transgendered individuals. Since that time, I have started this blog, created a Twitter account (@linz21079) and recently started a Facebook page and so far the response has been almost all positive. I only wish I could encourage more ladies like myself to join the club.

I have a good friend, who for the sake of this discussion we’ll call “Julie,” who is one of the most amazing ladies I know. She is 27, pre-op transsexual, Ivy League educated, has wonderful job, and is drop-dead gorgeous. “Julie” and I have the same therapist; if I had met her anywhere else I would not have known she is transgendered. The girl truly has everything going for her and is scared to death she’ll lose everything if ANYONE outside her circle of trust finds out.  Yet “Julie” is so articulate and full of great ideas, I feel it’s a shame that she won’t open up and share her gifts with the community.

I understand her fears. It’s hard enough accepting the fact you are transgendered, coming out to family and friends, finding the right time to tell co-workers and associates, and that’s not to mention trying to determine when to tell someone you are dating. Being transgendered is like navigating a mine field.

I know other girls who as soon as they find love, disconnect from the transgendered community all together, partly out of pressure, either real or perceived, from their significant other, and partly out of a desire to simply assimilate into mainstream society.  I don’t think it should be an “either/or” proposition, you can still network with other transgendered individuals and keep your mainstream life.

Like it or not, we will always be slightly different than genetic females and we share a unique life experience. If we don’t communicate this experience, we don’t do ourselves any favors.

There is a portion of America that will never accept us for who we are. There is another portion of America that, given the opportunity to see well adjusted transgendered individuals in society, would be more than willing to acccept us and future generations. The media will always focus on the extreme members of our society and make it an “us against them” argument. It’s up to us, as transgendered individuals, to utilize social media tools to promote a new image.

1.) Build a Strong Support Group – Without my support group, I would not be the woman I am today. It begins and ends with family, but extends to my friends, therapist and doctors. I understand that I am lucky to have a supportive family and that some of you might not have that luxury. While I certainly extend you my sympathy, this should not keep you from accomplishing your goal. Start with those who are supportive of you, rather it be friends, on-line associates, co-workers, teachers, or medical professionals. That last group, medical professionals, are imperative. This journey cannot be made without routine medical consultation, examinations, and therapy sessions. After you get your support group together, find a therapist who specializes in this field.

Your therapist will become one of your best friends during your journey, helping you travel down the roughest of roads. Your therapist should be able to recommend you to other medical professionals you will need to consult during the process.

I cannot stress to you enough how dangerous it is to skip this step. While it may be tempting to avoid the cost associated with medical professionals, it is never safe to attempt this transition without their guidance.

2.) Know Thyself - Remember the words of the Oracle of Delphi, “Know Thyself.” This simply means that under the guidance of your therapist, determine whether you are a cross-dresser, transvestite or a transsexual. There is a huge difference between the three. Only a trained therapist can help you make this determination.

3.) HRT - If you and your therapist decide that you need to begin taking steps to transitioning, he or she will probably recommend you begin hormone replacement therapy under the guidance of a medical professional. If so, begin this process as soon as possible. As a male-to-female transsexual your body is under constant attack by testosterone, which causes your body to develop male sexual characteristics. More than likely, your doctor will prescribe a form of estrogen and a testosterone blocker.

As with any medication, there are side-effects associated, some of them you may find to be bothersome, but do not let these side-effects cause you to give up on the benefits they bring. Your skin will become softer and smoother; your hair and nails stronger. Fat and muscle distribution will become more like that of a genetic female.

3.) Lose the Beard - Once your support staff is in place, you begin your therapy sessions and medical consultations, and you begin HRT, you are ready to intensely focus on your physical appearance. Some girls transitioning can’t wait to run a plastic surgeon and throw down obscene amounts of money for breast augmentations, facial feminization surgeries, and other cosmetic procedures. I have met many girls with 38DD cups, full lips, high cheek bones, but still have a five o’clock shadow. Boobs and a beard is not a good look for anyone.

The first thing you will want to do is lose the beard. This means investing in a permanent hair-removal. I recommend laser hair removal. I’ve had laser hair removal on my entire body, with the exception of my lower legs, and it was well worth the money and pain I invested in it. Having laser on you the rest of your body is a luxury is a luxury; having it on your face is a necessity.

I’m not going to lie. It is extremely painful, but pain is temporary and being hair-less is forever.

Fortunately, I never had much facial hair, so the painful sessions I had to endure were minimal, but I despise facial hair so much I would have had the procedure even if I were born a genetic female. There are few things more feminine than having a baby smooth face.

4.) Say Goodbye to “Them” – Testosterone blockers chemically block your body’s production of testosterone. However, there are surgical steps you can take to further combat the assault of testosterone on your body. Talk to your therapist about an orchiectomy.  If he or she feels you are a candidate for this procedure, they can recommend you to a qualified physician for further consultation.

Some medical professionals advise against this procedure during transition, citing certain complications it can cause if you should choose to consider sexual reassignment surgery. However, due to advances in surgical techniques, a majority of specialists now agree the benefits of the procedure far outweight the negatives.

This procedure is permanent and as such should not be approached lightly. Afterwards, your body will be virtually free of all testosterone production. This will allow the estrogen to have uninhibited rule on your body. I try to keep this blog one for all ages, so I will spare you some of the graphic specifics of the procedure, but it will make transition and assimilation a lot easier.

5.) Avoid the Heidi Montag Syndrome - As I mentioned earlier, many girls beginning their transition rush off to a plastic surgeon and instantly become hooked on this 21st Century drug. Before their body heals from one procedure, they are already scheduling their next one. They end up looking like an X-rated Halloween character. There’s nothing wrong with having breast augmentation or facial feminization surgery, as long as  they feminize you and they don’t crate a caricature you. Your ultimate goal is to assimilate into society.

A lot of girls get involved in the adult entertainment industry to finance their transition. In order to make it in this industry, it seems they must develop a look that makes them even more obvious. I understand that transition is expensive and that transitioning can make it difficult to secure other employment. If you do need to work in the adult entertainment industry, try to do so promoting the “girl next door” look and not the “Jessica Rabbit” look.

6.) Dress Appropriately – This goes hand-in-hand with Step 5. It’s exciting when your body begins developing feminine characteristics and there is a temptation to show off every development. This is not how genetic girls dress on an everyday basis and if you choose to dress that way you will surely be “clocked.”

It’s been said that “every girl needs a little black dress,” and I agree. There is nothing wrong with having sexy items in your wardrobe, but you also want to fill your wardrobe with more traditional items. Instead of spending so much money at BeBe, look into spending money at Banana, Express and The Limited.

7.) Vocal Training - Some girls who transition never have a problem developing a feminine voice; others struggle with it. For those who of you who feel your voice may be a little too masculine there are several websites out there that help train you to speak with a more feminine voice. There are some surgical procedures out there that claim to help in this area, but I have not researched them thoroughly so I don’t feel I’m capable of commenting on them.

8.) Modesty is the Key – Men and women are different creatures with different needs and desires, especially sexually. Women are traditionally more modest than their male counterparts, yet I see many girls-in-transition on the Internet who flaunt a libido larger than any male I know. You do yourself no favors in investing time, money and energy into developing a feminine image and then promote any male characteristics that you may have.

In closing, these are merely my opinions. They are by no means sound medical advice. Every person’s transition is different and you should always consults with your therapist and support group before taking any step in your transition. With that said, I always enjoy talking to those in transition or considering transition. If you have questions about anything discussed here, my transition or transitioning in general, I am more than happy to correspond with you via e-mail.

You can always reach me at linz21079@aol.com or on Twitter @linz21079.

At first, I didn’t understand the problem. Over the past few years, I have slowly climbed up the corporate ladder. Throughout this entire time, I have never worried about intimidating my superiors by the clothes I wear or the bag I carry. I like nice things and have been lucky enough to buy, or receive as gifts, many of the designer items I like. With that said, I find it tacky when people buy a designer item with the logo emblazened on it. I even feel awkward wearing a pair of Louboutin’s because of the signature red sole (this uneasiness passes once I see them on my feet). While a Birkin does not contain any logos, it has a very distinctive look that speaks for itself. Is this person carrying the bag for what the look means ( “I have a luxury item that most people want but can’t have”) or is she carrying it to complete her ensemble.

I’m a firm believer that the bag you carry should complete your look. In an average month, I may carry 10 to 15 different bags to work, depending on what I’m wearing. A Birkin would be no different. I would carry it ONLY when it fit what I was wearing. I never carry any bag or wear a pair of shoes simply to flaunt the label and I have no respect for people that do.

On the other hand, if this lady is simply trying “accessorize” with her Birkin.  In other words, carry it only occassions to complete her look, I find no fault in her decision. I believe everything  a woman wears she be a true reflection of her personality. To tell someone not to carry a bag is in effect trying to change that person’s personality.

It would be nice if the United States–the greatest nation in the world–could open its borders to all who want to come. Unfortunately, our infrastructure can barely support the people who live here now and in order to keep the nation from becoming overpopulated due to immigration we have established laws to limit who can come here and for what reasons. Any comprehensive immigration reform must begin with an analysis of what positive legal immigration looks like.

Who do we want coming to our nation? This has nothing to do with a person’s ethnicity, but rather the qualities they can bring to enrich in our nation. Our nation’s leaders should determine the proper mix between skilled/unskilled workers, educated and uneducated, those who come for work and those who wish to flee political oppression. Our nation needs the proper mix of all these, but when we get too many from a particular group, our infrastructure starts to buckle. From what I can tell the Arizona law does not addres this at all.

The number one problem often associated with illegal immigration is crime. Indeed, it was the murder of an Arizona rancher that led politicians in that state to ram through the current legislation. Pundits from the right side of the aisle can quote off a list of statistics that supposedly link illegal immigration to a rise in both property and violent crimes throughout border states. While I may doubt the accuracy of some of this data, I do not doubt that a link does exist. Since we as a nation haven’t addressed my first point–who do we want to legally immigrate to the U.S.–anyone and everyone who wants to come, finds a way. This includes a lot of unsavory characters from outside this country.  Some flee trouble from their native land, others are involved in nefarious activities south of the border and their business as spilled into the States, and some are just common criminals who come to the States for work, but don’t leave their criminal past at the border.

In addition to establishing strict quotas of the type of immigrants we allow across our borders, we need to also remove the incentive for the criminally minded from coming across the border. This is a difficult task, but one that our station and Federal officials must address. It involves getting tough on crimes committed by illegal immigrants, cracking down on employers who hire illegal immigrants and reexamining the failed “War on Drugs.”  As it currently stands, the “War on Drugs” creates far more problems than it solves, including fueling the illegal drug trade on our Southern border.

I don’t see the Arizona law addressing any of these issues. Instead, I see a law, which may have good intentions, but since it is so poorly written, it’s easily attacked. In short, this law will do NOTHING to help solve our immigration problems. Instead, it will just serve to intensify tensions between the immigrant community and those who want to see comprehensive immigration reform.

Ten years ago, I was a 20 year college “kid” just beginning my journey into adulthood and in my transition. Looking back, I’m amazed at how far I’ve come. During that time, I finished my education, established my career, experimented with love, and saw more of the world than I had in the previous two decades combined.  Perhaps the Grateful Dead summed it up best, “what a long, strange trip it’s been…”

As we begin the new decade, I approach it with great hope and I am cautiously optimistic I can achieve even more in the next 10 years than in the aughts. In January, I will officially become a homeowner for the first time in my life. Imagine that, my own piece of the American Dream.  This comes at a time when my professional career seems to be only starting and my business dreams becoming a reality.  Once this business becomes a reality, I can finally take the time off to focus on SRS and take another huge step in my transition.

Here’s to the hope of a new year and a new decade! I wish you all the best in the times ahead.

While we’re on the subject of sports, I came across an interesting story today about a new professional women’s football league. Really? Is this a good idea?

I realize that it might sound hypocritical for me to talk about gender bending stereotypes and I really don’t have a problem with women who chosse to participate, but what bothers me is the highly sexualized nature of the game. The women’s uniform are a little more than bra & panties with shoulder pads and a helmet. Again, nothing wrong with women showing off their body, but to sexualize women in this context is kind of weird to me.

Even though I was born with male chromosomes, I idenitfy as a female and I’ve taken steps to achieve a feminine appearance in every aspect of the word. I want a guy who is attracted to me for my feminine qualities. The organizers of this football league seem to be selling women, but for their masculine qualities–strength, agility, toughness, etc.  Will this idea really pay off? Is there really a market for it?

Sadly, if this were to happen in the United States some lunatic Left wing advocacy group would clog our courts with superfluous law suits in support of the illegal aliens.

My agent, who also happens to be a close friend, is trying to convince me to move to the northern suburbs, get more house for my money,but I’m a city girl at heart. I tried to suburban lifestyle and it wasn’t for me. So I’ve narrowed my searches to a few neighborhoods within the city. I saw a lot of great properties, it’s a matter of narrowing down the choices and taking a second look at the properties I really enjoy. It’s exciting, but frustrating at the same time. I can’t believe that in a little over a month I could be a home owner.

Later in the afternoon, one of my friends who is a real estate agent took me to look at some condos. I’m tired of renting and I’m finally looking to buy. I found several places in the neighborhoods I like and hope to make an offer in the next few weeks. I realize that things can get a bit overwhelming for a first time buyer, but day one of house hunting went by without any hitches. I’m not naive enough to believe the entire process will be this smoothe, but I’m happy with what I experienced today.

Everything seems to be looking up.

The date was highly enjoyable. It with dinner and then a trip to a wine bar. The conversation flowed smoothly and the night ended with a buzz induced kiss, which is completely acceptable.  On a scale of one to ten, I would rate the date an 8 and look forward to a second date.

Besides his looks, his confidence is his best trait that I see so far. While I am fiercely independent and like to control many aspects of my life, I expect a man to take control of a date–decide where we are going to go, what we are going to do, to step out and take control of the conversation and to make me the center piece of the evening.  It’s take confidence to do this. This guy barely knew me, but refuse to be intimidated. He called me this morning, told me what time to be ready, picked me up and from that point on he controlled the evening and when the evening wasn’t about me, it was about us.

Now that he has passed the preliminary tests, the real analysis begins, but I am hopeful.